Sometimes when asked, “How’s it going?” or “What’s going on
lately?” it’s just easier to say, “Fine,” or “Not much.” If not giving the
simple one or two word answer, it might turn into a whole story…
First Story:
5 Red Flags & 1 Orange Cat
Red Flag #1
I've noticed that the gas bill has been unusually high for a
couple of months... Huh... Have we had the heat on more than we thought?
Is it just inflation? I don’t know. Huh...
Red Flag #2
Have you noticed that the hot water gets to the shower so
much faster than it used to? Yeah, I've noticed that too... Weird... I
wonder why? Huh...
Red Flag #3
Have you noticed lately that when you turn on the cold
water, hot water comes out for a minute before it gets cold? Maybe I
have... Weird... I wonder why,,, I don't know... Huh...
Red Flag #4
Have you noticed that when you're in the kitchen there's a
spot on the tile where it's warm on your feet? No, I'm not usually
barefoot. Could it be from the dishwasher? Maybe the air isn't
reaching it? What if it's coming from under the refrigerator? I don't
know... Weird... Huh...
Red Flag #5
Have you noticed that the cat has started lying in the
dining room all the time? Yeah, why is that? I don't know.
It's always the same spot. Maybe he likes being able to keep an eye on us in
the bedroom or the kitchen or the living room and that's the best place to see
all three. Maybe. He seems totally relaxed there. Weird... I know...
weird... Huh...
Next story:
The Mouse Who Gave His Life to Solve the Mysteries
Our air conditioner when out. The repair man opened
the air conditioning unit, saw a mouse who'd crawled in and bitten the wires
which blew a fuse. He tossed the mouse, changed the fuse, and closed the
door to the repaired system. Due to a little policy, it was done... no charge…
end of story…
Except that while the repairman was here, I told him about
Red Flags #2-#4.
He solved every mystery in no time, (even the ones I didn't
tell him about because I didn't know they were mysteries).
... Well, not no time… There was time for a coyote to come
out of the woods right outside the window and grab a big chicken... There was
time for us to run out and yell at the coyote who just looked at us and paced
around deciding what to do, dropped the hen, and finally took off… There was
time for the repairman to send his assistant into the woods to retrieve the
chicken (The chicken who, by the way, I'd just painted a portrait of and posted
about her that very day)... Tragically, not a good end for the hen (R.I.P. Eleanor)...
anyway... I digress…
Back to 5 Red Flags & 1 Orange Cat
"You have a slab leak." These are not words of
comfort for a homeowner.
“There's a hot water leak in a pipe somewhere under your
house. The hot water heater is working nonstop as hot water keeps pouring
out the hole.” (Red Flag #1) “The rocks and concrete of the foundation
are continually being heated, so the water in the pipes is surrounded by
heat. When you turn on the shower, the water in the pipe is already hot
and ready.” (Red Flag #2) “Since both hot and cold water pipes are sitting in
the heated area, they both are filled with hot water. When you turn on
the cold, first it flushes out what's there, warm water.” (Red Flag #3)
The heated tiles in the spot in your kitchen is where the pipes are closer and
you can feel it.” (Red Flag #4). “The cat has probably found a spot
that feels good and just wants to stay right there.” (Red Flag #5)
Well... am I living on a bed of heated magma like a volcano?
“No.”
Fast forward a few days to the arrival of the “Leak
Detection Team.” They spend the day with lasers guns and wands and head phones
and meters and all kinds of equipment (just picture the Ghostbusters) and
determined the exact spot where the leak was... the exact spot where the
cat has been stretched out so comfortably for the last couple of weeks.
The moral of the story (I guess) is to pay attention to your
pet!
So... they come back Friday to take a jack hammer to my
dining room floor.
Epilogue
The guys were great and fixed everything good as new!
"How’s it going?" Great. Just fine. And you?











































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